Don't Let Me Get On My Soap Box!

So I just had to rant about this... Well read on if you dare.

I went to Panera Bread with my bestie to study for exams back in Nov. When I approached the counter to order my mac n cheese (fattening but awesome), the cashier said, “Ohhh your hair looks really cute!” I smiled and thanked her (I had just taken down my twists that day). I did sorta give her a side eye because she had bone straight hair. But much to my surprise, she said, “I cut mine off so it can grow back curly. I messed up the first time. This time it should come in curlier.” Then she proceeded to take off her wig (I’m telling you, it looked like her real hair) and showed me her shaved head. Now… At this point my heart ached for her. I said, “Wow you’re brave…” and before I could tell her that wouldn’t change anything she was done processing my order. 

The moral of the story?

I don’t know what it is with black women and curl pattern… but this is getting out of hand. So many women are misguided about their hair. We see Youtubers go through their hair journeys and rave about products defining their curl pattern and we believe we’ll have the same hair. 

But NO my hearts! This is a fantasy!

If you don’t have a curl pattern, you DON’T have one. And enough of this bullshit about black girls with a curl pattern have good hair, or mixed ancestry.

NO sweetie!

You get what you get. I’m fat! You don’t see me going around saying skinny people have better genes than me and the like.

So stop being jealous, and ignorant.

Educate yourself and the rest will follow!

There is no such thing as “good hair.” Sorry, you’ll just have to love what you got. Do you know how much time this cashier wasted on her natural hair journey? She could have more hair and more options if she just embraced what was growing out of her head. 

OH and one more thing! 

So many naturals try to act all righteous when a relaxed sister continues to relax their hair and not join the natural hair movement. But some natural women (*cough* the ones who MUST have a curl pattern *cough*) suffer from the same complex they did when they were relaxing. 

SOME New Natural Sisters: “If I go natural, my hair will be unprocessed but CURLY and cute.”

SOME New Relaxed Sisters: “If I relax my hair, it’ll be STRAIGHT, long, and flowing.”

In both cases, altering their kinky hair to something they consider more desirable is the main objective. Both choose to alter their hair because they believe their kinky hair isn’t acceptable. However, in the case of natural hair, when some women find out they don’t have curly kinky hair, they flip out. 

“OMG! I don’t have curly hair so I only have nappy, afro textured hair… I cut off all my hair for this?”

Listen, 4c hair is just as beautiful as 4a hair (or whatever typing system you go by, there are several). I’m supposedly 4a BUT I wear my hair in an afro puff and afro 85% of the time. I embrace my afro texture along with my curly texture. Just love your hair. If you don’t love your hair, why should anyone else?

Get over this curl pattern business. Love your hair for what it is.

Peace out!